Swallowing the Key

I am learning that most of the difficulties we face are self-created: If we could only get out of our own way, things would be so much easier.

There was a time I believed that their was this impenetrable wall between myself and God.  I thought that there was no way to cross this divide.  I thought there was no possibility of union.

I am learning that I built this wall.  The good news is that I built a door in the wall.  The bad news is that I locked it up and swallowed the key.

A lifetime ago, I would have told you that my brokenness and failings are what keep me away from God.  And that is a little bit true.  I have this sense that this is, at best, half the story, though.

The other half of the story?

This separation from God is really about my unwillingness to own the best parts of “me.”  Sometimes I think about this as the primal breath that God breathed into dirt that made me a human being.  I have heard it called my true self.  And also Christ within me.

This unnameable place is both mine and God’s.  My failure to experience his connection to me is my failure to own these most intimate parts of my very nature.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s